A little known fact about the Revolutionary War is that George Washington's famous crossing of the Delaware River in December of 1776 was made possible by the bravery of a school of genetically modified, patriotic carp. These carp, created by a collaboration between Albert Einstein, Charles Darwin, and Nikola Tesla, three time-traveling super scientist heroes bent on maintaining the proper flow of time and events for the good of all mankind. The carp were developed to hunt down enemy submersibles that Washington didn't even know existed. Plans for the submersibles made their way into enemy hands via an accidental time jump when a technician dropped his fish filet sandwich and hit his head on the "send" button as he bent down to pick it up. So, when you salute the flag or sing the National Anthem, remember all the patriotic carp that made it possible.
-Rob Signed Off
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